Blog post: mythical “William”

A few days ago by chance, I met a woman prohibited. Began chitchatting. It always amazes me that you never really understand who person is where they come from without conversation. This woman when I mentioned I grew up in Saudi Arabia. My father worked for a company in Saudi Arabia and my father’s company was Aramco also receives Aramco world! I was thrilled to find that her 2nd-husband was the recipient of the Aramco world magazines. When I had a moment I was able to view slides of adventures and explorations. She had on one of her travel excursions. We discussed how people and generations have changed. We talked at length about the differences and generations and how these differences have made a culture and generation that is lost to me a little bit of the gentlemanly manners that my father and his generation actually always upheld. We talked it length about how men will wear their baseball caps even at church should of course. But that was completely unacceptable. Even though I hadn’t thought of it. She was right. The sign of disrespect, and the manner in which casual attire and casual manners has invaded our culture seems to really have created a culture devoid of the gentleman ideal. We also talked about how generations changed from being outside, exploring, how travel excursions cruises etc. bus tours are all set up for a very superficial of any locale. She described how she loved being able to explore areas meet people learn of culture and customs out of the way but authentic restaurants, shops and antiquities. I also said I messed when I was at one France being able to not be considered at worst purple and then be able to shop or review sites in a manner that allowed you to truly see the real area. Not talking of back streets or garbage or dangerous areas. I’m talking about not just the superficial commercialized souks were set up stalls with elevated prices and generic products.

At the end of june I was able to join life loyal…for kappa alpha theta… after a year of payments i will have my fees for corporate paid for life….. so iwill be a sister of kappa alpha theta… for life…paid in full…. what a great feeling…
I look through the theta magazine…. and see all the amazing women who have really made such greataccompllishments in ther lifetime ..

I wonder if I will ever get the opportunity to actually have the life i planned unstead of having to fix allthe horrid experiences these horrid criminals caused….

My sisters adn i all pledged teh same kappa alpha theta… when i look at so many of the alumni I am so proud to be in such great company….and to be an alumni….

women like Laua bush and her daughters….
signory weaver….
and each month… more and more woman who make a positive impact on this world…

there are groups within groups to join… adn you find out htese women are everywhere!

I hope and pray i am able to meet so many more of these women.. who are role models… who are inspirational, who are just great women… the kind of women you can or want to be best friends with …
I see such a marked difference in people i have met… who’s morals and values.. who’s upbringing..and belief system are not like those yousee in sororities… and it makes a difference…
i dont mean to be a snob.. but it makes a difference… when youare brought up not to bully… or not to lie or cheat or steal… when you have strong women in your life who show youthat anything is possible.. and who are encouraging and supportive of hopes and dreams… who wouldn’t break the law… but become the lawyers( like my sister) who uphold the laws… or the judges.. or the congressmen..(or woman I mean..)
and when they work together to make a change.. or for a cause… that is power…

and just knowing that these women are my sisters… maybe not all by blood… ( but two of my real life sistrs are also kappa alpha theta sisters… HA!) knowing they are there to help.. to encourage.. to uplift… to inspire…. or even to shop with… to laugh with … and even to cry with….
when as you get older, and somedays when it seems really lonly knowing somewher outthere … are girls and women.. whoshare the same values.. and who are your soriority sisters…. it makes teh world seem more connected somehow… and I’m really glad that I joined life loyal…for kappa alpha theta… even the name of it.. loyal for life… is what life loyal means in a way…. and what better way to describe the peole you want in your corner.. in your life… but by being there for your entire life!…. luv mary jean ziska


it just makes a huge difference…

 At the end of june Iwas able to join life loyal…for kappa alpha theta… after a year of payments i will have my fees for corporate  paid for life….. so iwill be a sister of kappa alpha theta… for life…paid in full…. what a great feeling…
I look through the theta magazine…. and see all the amazing women  who have really made such greataccompllishments in  ther lifetime ..

I wonder if I will ever get the  opportunity to actually have the life i planned unstead of having to fix allthe horrid experiences these horrid   criminals  caused….

My sisters adn i all pledged teh same kappa alpha theta…  when i look at so many of the alumni I am so proud to be in such great company….and to be an alumni….

women like Laua  bush and her daughters….
signory weaver…. ,

and each month… more and more woman who make a positive impact on this world…

there are groups  within groups  to join… adn you find out htese  

So when I said I wanted a nice waspy clean cut conservative
guy…… one with a mom who was a member of jr league… one  who I could accompany on shopping adventures at
waterside shops… one who I could laugh with who was a starch republican,
who  was honest, and trustworthy, who
actually was intelligent and believed in furthering education…  actually supportative of me attaining an mba…
or having a successful business… or even who appreciated me as a great mother
and wife…..  I came up with a list of all
kinds of attributes that I have always admired in  this “mythical guy”…. You know not just
handsome… which in my case meant blond hair, blue eyes.. tall, thin, intelligent
athletic and friendly and loyal and faithful someone  who could be your  best friend…. Who you could share your hopes
and dreams with… who  made your life
better by just being a part of it…. Who enjoyed my company as much as I enjoyed
his… who believed in dreams coming true… in life being everything you ever
wanted in it… and who was amazing…..     
one who was a true partner, who actually liked me.. wanted to spend time
with me… a real.. person.. without a multiple of issues and problems…

Were is anyone like that??????? Anyone….  One normal 
person… or family…..  one guy who
is Caucasian  tall, thin. Blond…. Or blond
at one time… And blue eyed… who can carry on a normal conversation.. even be
witty…  is that really too much to ask
for?  A person with ambition…. Like the
vineyard vine guys….who created a business….. how about the visionaries… dreamers
with practical experience and practical  experience
applications… and someone with ambition…. Drive… and goals and  a bucket list….

And passion…. With life.. and their family … and the ability
to be great to their family..  and be a
great dad….

The list is never ending.. and I honestly don’t think there
is anyone  who will ever allow me to meet
such a guy…   if he even exists…. I
don’t  think  the ” freaks”   in charge.. the ones  who think they are” god”… will ever allow me
to be the best possible me..  and have
the life I was supposed to have…  will ever
 stop harmng my life.. they ruined my
credit… stole my identity…. Put me though the worst experiences of my life… and
they never stop..  since 2002…. I have  just horrid experiences to go though… one
horrible experience after  another that ruins
yet another part of my life…  they took a
very  happy nice innocent well adjusted
girl…opps… woman… who had hopes and dreams.. who had ambitions and desires
for  specific goals to be met..  who imagined a great life and future because I
had had a great life once   wonderful family
 once and wonderful friends once…  And then they systematically ruined
everything…. And destroyed what should have been ten great years of my life
where I should have been able  to  date 
get married.. have children, have a career… go on to further my
education if I so desired…. Take  classes
of interest.. throw dinner parties… go on vacations and laugh and make great
memories….    Joined not only my soriority alumni
association but also be a member of jr league.. and make a postivie difference
in  the lives I was able to touch…   

Somedays talking to people on the phone… it’s like talking
to total strangers…  I end up in tears…  feeling like I had just wasted time energy
and  my own thoughts and feelings..
on  who? And why?  I am left with  this empty 
pit  where my heart used to be…  and feeling more alone… wondering who the
hell I was sharing my thoughts or feelings with…and how they were going  to use that information to harm my life…  I  used
to think how glorious it was to share my thought s and feelings to these people
on the phone.. who were suppsed to love me to care about me to be my genuine friends
and family…. How great to build these bonds of knowledge of trust and of all
the  little stories you gather over your
shard lifetime…     but if you are not sharing  the stories.. the comments on  books or televisions shows..  not sharing  your utmost dreams with someone who actually
does care…   what a waste ….. when there
are genuine friends… I cannot seem to contact… that I cannot seem to reach or
speak to…   who would honestly care… Help… find me… please….
I am lonely… and I miss my family and I miss my friends… i miss them every minute of every day…..  I miss the life I had and
the life I was supposed to have ….  And I
honestly hate the imposter criminal  scum
who stole it all from me…  I will never
forgive or forget… EVER……your part in all of this… 

My Adventures in Prague & Beyond

Sunday, April 24, 2005

 My Adventures Finding
Matt Ziska’s Statue…..

Twice in two days, I know… I don’t write in forever, and
then two times in two days. Anyways, it was beautiful out again today so I went
exploring again. Today I went to Vysehrad after church and then later to Karlin
and Vitkov Hill.

Vysehrad was the first seat of Czech royalty. Today, there
is no castle on the grounds, but there are parks, the church of St. Peter and
St. Paul, and a national cemetery.

There are a lot of pictures from today in my Prague folder.
These pictures of Vysehrad, Vitkov Hill, and Karlin are above the pictures from
yesterday.

Zizkov is a suburb of Prague next to Karlin, another suburb.
I went to find a statue of a man on a horse for one of my high school
classmates, Matt Ziska. He said his family has an ancestor that has a statue. I
had heard about a similiar statue near Karlin in my History & Theory of
Urbanism, so I decided to see if it was the right statue. I want to see as much
of Prague as I can, so even if it wasn’t the right statue, it was okay.

When I got off the metro, I realized that the statue was on
a freakin’ mountain in the middle of Prague. I am not kidding you. I had to
search pretty hard just to find a path up the mountain. LOL! After walking a
fourth of the way around the bottom I found a road up. I was so out of breath
by the time I made it to the top of the huge hill. The statue of the man on a
horse was really big too. I later found out that it is the largest equestrian
statue in the world, standing at about 30 feet tall!!!!

I talked to Matt later today and he said that his uncle told
him that the statue is on the east side of Prague, but Prague is huge! This one
that I had found was on the northeast side of town, maybe it was the right
statue; we weren’t sure.

Later tonight, I was looking through my Prague guide book
and to my surprise I found the statue that I had seen today. It was a statue of
Jan Zizka! I had found the statue! 🙂 Jan Zizka is huge in the history of
Czechoslavakia (now split into the Czech Republic and Slovakia). He defeated an
army of several thousand on Vitkov Hill (the hill I had called a mountain) with
his small army of Hussites. The area around Vitkov Hill was later renamed
Zizkov after Jan Zizka.

Jan Zizka was born in Tabor, Czech Republic. Tabor is south
of Prague and in this town there is also a statue of Jan Zizka there in a
square that is also named after him. I was really happy that I had finally
found the statue for Matt. All my family has is a dumb metro stop and Matt has
a whole suburb named after his family and a 30ft tall statue of his ancestor.
LOL!! It’s okay, I was shocked just to have a metro stop. 🙂

Hope everyone had a great weekend! I know I did. This was
probably the best weekend site-seeing in Prague that I have had yet.

posted by Dalyn @ 7:12 PM

Dear
Mattie                                                                               
July 7^th 2012

Another year
already?  … Really?…… Ha!  Can you believe we’ve survived yet another
year! And here we are at another birthday! 
One of these  years perhaps we can
spend our birthday together!… When God Grants us a   year free of problems HA!  Hopefully soon, both our lives will be
great! 

Madelon
Marie ziska… what can I say ( actually a lot HA!)  I am honored to be your sister, to share your
birthday ( July 7^th ) and to remember you as my  best friend and  to have 
grown up with you.. To have such a pure bright, wise soul for a baby
sister has been intimidating at times,  
but a sheer joy  to experience!

I wish your
entire life had been filled with “pure sugar and spice and everything nice” I
have loved having the “light of your 
spirit “ shine even near me- to have had such a loving, beautiful, kind,
generous,   sister in my life!  To grow up with .. was a blessing- Your
unconditional and devoted love from a best friend and from you and Maura is a
true sisterhood! 

I wish for
thisbirthday adnthis year that yoru hopes and dreams  come true, that yoru heart is filled with
love, that your pocketbook ( ie finances) 
are overflowing that your passions are fulfilled and that you enjoy yor
birthday surrounded by friends and family! 

A special
note to my sister madelon marie ziska.. you hold a special place in my heart
that can never be replaced will never be forgotten… My love for my  sisters and family and friends is timeless
and never ending… 

Mattie, just
the  thought  of anyone even hurting you   or your dreams  causes me pain and tears… your spirit filled
with love, generosity, and positive life affirming inspiration is so unique and
so valuable and so evident to everyone you meet.. you are life enhancing in
your ability to see and be your authentic self! What a gift!

May guardian
angels protect you from harm, may your prayers be answered immediately, may
your impact on the world be as positive and inspirational as you are to your
family and to me..

I’ve loved
you from the moment Mom brought you home from the hospital my first memory..
maybe even before  when mom and dad left
my 4^th birthday party for your 
arrival into this world!

You have
been a bright light in this world for me and everyone you meet!

I miss
having you  as my best friend, and in my
life everyday ! You are a treasure that is irreplaceable!  Ay God Bless you & Protect you always!

All my love
forever and ever my baby sister… luv mary jean ziska

( the real
regular person, now a bit older, at 46… by july 7^th HA!

To madelon
marie ziska

Ps:  You are beautiful inside and outside.. your
intelligence, your  wisdom , your
friendship, your kindness, … there are so many positive adjectives… to describe
you… You have so much to offer this world….I pray God allows you to shine! Luv
mary jean ziska

Mattie, I hope you got this present sent form neiman marcus… and the card with money in it…. I keep getting conflicting  information  on what  you did receive.. and when you did recieve it… know that i love my sister madelon marie ziska… you were/are a blessing in soo many ways…  you will always  have a treasured place in my heart… my sister my friend…  you and  Maura i miss every minute of every day…. you were my strength … my love for you both… never ending… and always present….. no matter where you are..i will remember everything  you brought to my life… ..  i will stand up for you always… i will love you always… and i will remember you always as my constant best friends….my sisters..   luv mary jean ziska