Well this past week i feel like i have been fixing and re fixing computers… downloading and re downloading  info and disks and just when i think  that i have everything fixed i would plug in something into the usb port and kaboom.. the blue screen o f death saying ” bad pool header”…. or some other message that made no sens to me… and would  leave me scrambling to  Google what i was to do to fix it.. or contacting my computer website that has an automated chat… and is really not much help… UGG so i have tons to catch up on ….

my sisiter was in town for two weeks and it was like a stranger was here… i don’t know who she was acting like but i have to say this visit was nothing like any other visit i have ever had with  a loving  and caring sister… it wasn’t like my best friend.. and i feel even more lonely after her non visit…. this un-twin who shares my birthday… who i considered one of my best friends… who i wanted to go to Europe with… to bless with having her hopes and dreams come true…. actually made me cry… and when i cried i thumbs up was given  by her… sh acted like a uncaring boy… like a stranger… and like someone who just wanted some thing from me…  i found out at the end of the visit it is  a photo album… did i mention that this person hung out with  Sheri one of the babysitters instead of my mom? weird… so no after giving a diamond and sapphire ring to what was supposed to be my sister and she said score as if she had just conned me out of a ring my sister had told mt to keep safe….i won’t  turn over any of my families possessions ….. i have had far to many con artist in my life since meeting gerard and his scummy parasitic associates…ugg….   

 you know the anticipation of having your best friend come to visit… hoping you can just catch up and talk… can  share all your new hopes and dreams… hoping you can  ask advice.. and hugs and memories… i mean when i went to a reunion with kathy young, and carolyn walters and kathie higdon in texas…  it was like not a minute had gone by.. we could  chat about ……. growing up… literary…. they knew everything.. we even went through our old jr high journals…. with tons of notes… still dint know how we managed to learn anything.. all we did was write notes….

from memories of   jr. high..we talked about ….  life in Saudi.. about memories and new adventures.. about  family and children… about everything… like  real friends ….   i used to talk on the phone for hours and hours to all my friends…

i often wonder when i stated talking to the wrong  people on the phone.. i still want to think it was 2003 when gerard got  terrible about me always having my cell phone on and with me at all times… when he threatened me on the phone..

was it when  i had my own business… starting when i moved into my condo in 1999? or when i met the scum of the earth in 2003?….  was that when jobs and business were first stolen?

possibly….  i was too naive… too innocent and too trusting then…. … i just saw the Italian job… (a movie about criminals)…

when will anyone make some nice movies that don’t  involve making criminals glamorous?  in the movie… n criminals were manipulating lives by screwing up their phone lines.. even having a fake cable person come to fix the cable… life imitating art? or art imitating life……. also these criminals had the knowledge to  manipulate the lights at intersections to divert traffic…   its no fair… criminals winning… bullies winning…. its just not fair…. when will any of the good guys actually win… succeed and  when will these criminals be put in jail and not allowed to harm anyone ever again?