So back for another post… maybe I should start twittering…HA!… what a horrid day…  the lost blog post that I desperately tried to recreate.. but isn’t exactly what I had originally written… and trying to fix one thing after another… was very tiring…  just I guess a sad day…

did walk on the treadmill and watched a bit of serendipity… yes a chick flick…. questions of destiny.. of fate…of not only meeting someone.. but of choices verses what is meant to happen… 

the gingerbread man story… all based on faith… on a knowing that a person’s life has a purpose and meaning.. of meeting that special someone is destiny… inevitable… that all things happen for a reason…
 
But I can’t for the life of me figure out why on earth these past 7- 8 years have happened…  why did 9/11 happen?  can’t figure it out at all….not at all… so today while questioning why criminals are free.. why bully girls who went to Ohio state… ..  actually bully and harm others on purpose…  why bad things happen to great and nice people…  all i can say is it does not make any sense… bad experiences do not make you stronger… they change you…  

Its like the poem of children learn what they live… one action creates a reaction… and depending on the action … like kindness or love will definitely  give a reaction much different than, bulling and lies, …  

Though I have been saying my novena for one year and one month… i have no answers… and no prayers  for financial miracles have been answered yet…or anyone on the list of people i have included who have asked for prayers… no one has mentioned that their lives have been astronomically blessed… so today… my faith is a bit weak…   

 One thing I did want to mention… that I believe a person is allowed to be free in America … to date whomever they want…  right? is it reverse discrimination when someone wants to meet a clean cut normal professional guy who wears blue blazers and khaki pants?… who may actually own a tuxedo… may have manners… be brought up as a gentleman… today I was discussing this with a stranger,… who told me that ted bundy wore a blue blazer and khaki pants… in the attempt of trying to persuade me from ever wanting what I want to find in a guy… i happened to mention that since 14 and at boarding school… boys from other schools would come to dances in their ties.. their blazers and pressed pants… that I am allowed to want to date the type of person with whom I feel comfortable…. someone who could go out to dinner …. and yes I am attracted to white Caucasian men… and blue or light eyes… and light hair… would be great…   I am sure everyone out there has their preference… maybe someone they dated in high school became the type of woman they now like… and I want to go on the record for saying there is nothing wrong with that…  and those strangers who are neither friend or family… are allowed to have their opinions… but I am allowed to want what I want as well… so please no comments about how I am not allowed to want the type of guy I feel comfortable dating… or the type of guy I am looking for thank you for respecting my wishes… and if you want to be my friends I would think you would want me to be happy…   luv mary jean ziska